wasp.

This is not my weekend for inserts or animals.

Today was craziness. I woke up at 10:30. I showered. I dressed. I got in my car. I drove to Wal-Mart, Target, Books-a-Million and Hastings looking for the absolute perfect birthday gift for M. I bought things. I have things to take back. I still haven't figured out exactly what I want to give him. *sigh* I went back and forth until about 4:15 p.m. when I finally came home and he'd already left for the Metroplex. I ate some Schlotzsky's Deli while watching ANTM (woo traditions!) and otherwise did some stuff in my bedroom until oh about 7:15 when I came downstairs to watch some Friday Night Lights.

I plugged in my computer and was playing some music and doing a little straightening up downstairs before putting the DVD in. As I'm leaning over my computer to change the song, I hear a buzzing.

Do you know how much I loathe and detest and utterly fear buzzing?

It is so bad.

I am so scared of insects. It is not funny. But people laugh at me still. It's ok. It's an endearing trait of mine. People tend to think it's cute.

So I hear buzzing and I look up toward my light and what is buzzing around the light and the wall and me.

A wasp.

A yellowjacket.

A thing that will sting me and hurt me and kill me with fear.

Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness.

So this is what happened:

I screamed then I ran upstairs to my bedroom.
Then I realized it could still get me upstairs.
So I ran downstairs and frantically opened my front door and ran outside.
Then I realized my purse and keys were inside.
So I ran back inside. And upstairs.
My purse was upstairs.
I dug around in my purse.
I realized my keys and my cell phone were downstairs in the kitchen.
Which meant I had to go downstairs and walk across the whole living room with that thing buzzing around.
So I slowly crept down the stairs.
Then I lowered my head and didn't look as I quickly walked across the living room.
I stared at the floor the whole time.
Grabbed my keys and phone.
Looked back down and walked to the door.
Went to my car.
My first thought was "oh my, Michael's in Dallas. What am I going to do?"
Then I called Jimmy. He didn't answer.
I texted Jimmy and Randy to say that there was a wasp in my apartment.
Then Jimmy called back.
I told him I was leaving and not returning to my apartment. Ever.
He said he and Randy were going to dinner.
I joined them.
I ate cheesecake.
Jimmy and Randy came to my apartment.
Jimmy got my insect spray.
The wasp was no where to be found.
Jimmy sprayed some.
The wasp never came out.

So here I sit.
In my apartment.
With a wasp.
Waiting somewhere.
To come out and get me.
Probably when I go to sleep.
I'm going to sleep with the can of spray.
Yes, yes.
It will be ok.

11:05 PM 0 imprints on my clumsy heart